Being in the ministry of the gospel of Christ these past 37 years has exposed me to loads of human travails apart from my share of them too. I have concluded that most human beings will find themselves as victims of one situation or the other at certain times in their life’s trajectory.

Even the villains of this life are mostly victims who due to the trauma resulting from their tribulations have become instruments in the hands of the enemy that afflicted them. As it is often said, ‘hurting people hurt others’.

Most victims suffer as a result of the circumstances of their birth, upbringing, or even work. As victims mature, the seeds of fear, anger, resentment, distrust, perversion, pain, rejection, abuse, poverty, disease, and a myriad of other things grow with them, colouring their personalities with negativities they trivialize or are even completely oblivious to.

As humans, with the self-centred nature inherited from the fall of man, it is much easier to behold the mote in our brother’s eye than to discern the log in ours (Matthew 7:3-5). The seeds sown while men slept make themselves part and parcel of their character (Matthew 13:15-20). Parents, guardians, and shepherds go to sleep on the job at times.

A young lady sat across my table in a pool of tears. Her husband had divorced her on the discovery that she had her uterus perforated due to many abortion procedures. The procedures had been due to a promiscuous lifestyle that resulted from a rape. Reactions to rape are either resentment and frigidity towards men or sex addiction if there was a transference of lustful spirits which was the situation here. She was a victim.

Similarly, another young lady sat before me in a pool of tears. With discipline, she has kept her virginity throughout her teenage years. However, for some reason, her family did not trust her. Verbal abuses were the order of the day till she decided if I was vilified for a life I was not living, I should rather go and enjoy the wildlife. She went wild and reckless, till medical examinations began to cast doubt on her ability to give birth due to many abortion procedures. She was a victim of verbal abuse and low self-esteem.

A young man told the story of how an older lady in the neighbourhood initiated him into regular sex as a boy of ten. As he grew, so did his ability to satisfy the lustful older lady. It was only a matter of time before he became addicted to her. A day was incomplete without an affair with the lady. Being away from her meant finding someone that looked like her to engage with. He was a victim.

A young man was sent to live with his uncle who was a clergyman. Who else would give the mother confidence to be his father figure? Alas, it was the same man who introduced him to a homosexual lifestyle, sexually abusing him from childhood and painting an image on the canvas of his heart that could not be erased. He became a homosexual sex addict who could not imagine himself sexually engaging with a woman. He was a victim.

For another lady I knew, it was her father who walked out on their family when she was young and it birthed an insatiable desire for male affection. The fear of rejection meant she clung to every male boyfriend so tightly to the exclusion of all others. It was a way of fencing off others from him and controlling him. Of course, the relationships always ended badly as they found relating with her choking and stressful. Her controlling and manipulative tendencies were wearisome and exhausting. She was a victim. I could go on and on.

The truth is that most of us have experiences that sowed seeds that have affected us to varying degrees. The stories related above may be ones with grave impacts that you may not be able to relate to but lots of other things have happened that have affected us to lesser degrees but still mould us into less-than-complete personalities. Our spouses, family, colleagues at work and friends bear the brunt of our shortcomings.

The unfaithfulness of the woman by the well to her various husbands in John 4 might be due to her insatiable quest for love and acceptance because of a father who abandoned both her and her mother when she was a child. Rahab the harlot might have inherited the trade from her mother and did not know any other way of life other than to sell her body.

A young man got married and became lazy. The suffering wife investigated his family and discovered that while the mother hustled for the family’s well-being, the father loitered around the house in laziness and parasitical indolence. He was the image of the man he grew up with.

We give God the glory for the transforming power of the Word of God. The very circumstances we are victims of can become points of victory for us, causing the enemy to regret ever allowing us to go through what we went through. The healing and restorative power of God will deliver you from your trouble and God will send you to deliver others.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we are comforted by God.”‭‭. II Corinthians‬ ‭1‬:‭3‬-‭4‬ ‭NKJV

‬‬You have to realize God allowed you to pass through all you’ve been through so He can heal you and comfort you. Your misery now becomes a ministry when you take that comfort and healing and minister it to other people. In the words of Dr. Rodney Howard Browne, ‘the touch of God in your life will become the touch of God through your life’. When God touches you with the touch of His love and power, you will be able to touch others with the same love and power so they are transformed, just as you are.

Many people allow their tests and trials to overwhelm them and they give up on life, sit in bitterness and resentment, take to drug addiction, or even commit suicide. Unknown to them, there is gain hidden in the pain and a testimony hidden in the test. You need not allow the past to continue to haunt you today and stagnate you.

You need to move on from the misery of what you have passed through into the glorious future God has for you. There is light at the end of this tunnel and there is hope of a better day.

Don’t give up, because help is on the way.

(To be continued)

Victor Adeyemi