The very first love story of the Bible remains full of valuable lessons for the searching soul. The quest for true love remains one of humanity’s greatest search and the fallouts of the failures to find it continue to colour human perceptions with wrong colours. Heartbreaks, depressions, untimely deaths and a myriad of mental disorders result from the failures and yet nothing is as beautiful as true love when found. Nothing heals faster, builds better, nurtures richer and delights greater. Take true love out of the equation and relationships are nothing but evil contraptions designed for human destruction.

Enters Adam, the very first man made by God who created humanity and formed earthly suits (bodies) for them in two genders of male and female. The male was first formed (Genesis 2.6–7). His aloneness was however obvious (Genesis 2.18), especially for one who was made in the image of a God who inherently exists in three distinct personalities (1 John 5.7). Adam needed companionship, a need all the animals could not satisfy due to the differences in their constitution. Designed for companionship, sexual pleasure and procreation were added into the mix to enrich and foster the companionship and guarantee perpetuity for humanity. The world mistakenly separate the two from the primary purpose and the result is nothing but promiscuity, social dysfunctions, confusion and heartbreaks.

It is still not good for the Adams of this world to be alone, neither is it fulfilling for the Eve’s to be. We are made for connection. At the core of our humanity is the quest for companionship and to have it at an intimate level. Let the searching soul know that our God is rooting for you. God wants you connected. Never imagine you are praying out of God’s Will or desiring wrongly. One of the evils of the last days according to Paul, the Apostle, is ‘forbidding to marry (1 Timothy 4.3)’. This generation blames their woes on the Bible. The book is perfect and our marriages fall apart due to our imperfections, not that of the holy book. God is however blamed for our heartbreaks and His design perceived as defective. The lenses of human experiences, coloured by pain have presented a wrong picture of God’s beautiful and unbeatable plan. No alternative trumps God’s design. Two will always be better than one and companionship will always be preferred to aloneness (Ecclesiastes 4.9-12).

Sexual pleasure outside of the confines of marriage has been found to be substandard to intimacy within a lifelong committed relationship. To claim the preserve of pleasure to marriage will be preposterous but several research sources have concluded it is most fulfilling in long term monogamous relationships. God will always be wiser than man. Abandoning God’s plan is the reason for sexual dysfunctions, bizarre sexual orientations, the spread of several diseases and of course procreation in less than ideal conditions , leading to abortions, rejections and crime. The safety net of a long term monogamous relationship remains the best option for humanity.

I will not be so insensitive to the searching soul who has not found true love to hold onto. Don’t give up! In the mean time, take full advantage of family relationships and friendships. You may not enjoy companionship at the deepest level but you will not be alone nor lonely. It is also a time to take advantage of the lack of the distractions of caring for a spouse and raising of children to develop intimacy with God (1 Corinth 7.32-34). It is a time to serve God without any encumbrances. You can never over prepare for marriage. The quality of a marriage is the product of the quality of the character of the partners in the union. As you mature spiritually, so will it affect the quality of character that you will attract. It will also increase the likelihood of your marital success when you eventually marry. Marriage is good and was created by God. Eve came into the life of Adam to be a blessing and not a curse. Continue to look to God for a spouse if you are single and if you are married, continue to look to God for the wisdom to make your home the house of bliss God intends and that you dream of. (To be continued)

Victor Adeyemi